In Pantoland-1
"I"mboredwithtelevision,"announcedankeyfromhereasychairintheEmpyrean,switgoffTheLateShowandadjustinghis/herfalsiesinsidehereousredbustier."IwilldesdagaintoPantoland!"
InPantoland,
Everythingisgrand.
Well,letsnotexaggerate--grandish.Notlikewhatitusedtobebut,then,whatis.Evenso,allstillbrightlycoloured--garish,infact,allyourprimaries,red,yellow,blue.Andallexcessive,sothatyourcastlehasmoreturretsthanaregularcastle,yourforestissiderablymoreimperablethantheaverageforestand,notinfrequently,yourcowhasmorethanitsnaturalshareofteatsandudders.Weretalkingmultipleprojes,here,spikes,sprouts,boobs,bums.Itsabristlingworld,inPantolaherphallicorelsedemonically,aggressivelyfemaleandtheressomethingarchaicbehinditall,archaitheworstsense.Somethingpositivelyfilthy.
Butallalsotwo-dimensional,sothatMaidMarianshouse,inPantolandsfictiveNottingham,isflatasapahefrontdoormaywellopenwhenshegoesin,butitmakesahollowsoundbehindherwhensheslamsitshutairefa?adegetstheshivers.Robinserenadesherfrombelow;sheopensherwindowtoriposteandwhatyouseebehindherofherbedroomisonlyapaintedbedheadonapaintedwall.
Ofcourse,therealproblemhereisthatitisBaronHardupofHardupHall,fatherofderella,stepfatheroftheUglySisters,who,thesebarrendays,alltoooftenoccupiesthepostofMinisterofFinanPantoland.Occasionally,evennow,thefree-spenderssuchasPrincessBadroulbadortakethingsintotheirownhandsandthenyougetsomewonderfuleffects,suchasathree-mastedgalleoninfullsailbreastingthroughtumultuousstormswiththunderboomingandlightningbreakingaboutthesparsasthegallantshiptakesDickWhittingtonandhiscateitherawayfromorelsebacktoLondonamidstanostalgicseriesoftableauxvivantsofBritishnavalheroessuchasRaleigh,Drake,CaptainCookandNelson,discthingsorkeepingtheelsafeflishshipping,whileDickgivesoutafull-throatedtraltorenditionof"IfIhadahammer"withachorusofratsinmasksandtights,courtesyoftheItaliatischool.
Illusionandtransformation,kitintopalacewiththeaidofgauzeetc.etc.etc.Youknowthekindofthing.Italloney.And,sometimes,asifitwerethegreatestillusionofall,theremightbeanincursionofthereal.Realhorses,perhaps,trotting,neighingandwhinnying,largeaslife.Yet"largeaslife"isnttherightphrase,atall,atall."Largeaslife"theymightbe,iextoftheauditorium,butwhentheprosiumarchgapesaswideasthemouthoftheogreinJadtheBeanstalk,thosefortywhitehorsespullingtheglasscoachoftheprincesslookaslittleandinsequentialaswhitemice.Theyarereal,allright,butinsignifit,andonlyraisealaughorroundofapplauseifohemientlydropsdung.
Andsometimestherellbeadog,oftehosesandy-coloured,short-hairedterriers.Ontheprogrammes,itwillsay:"Chuckles,playedbyhimself,"justabovewhereitsays:"CigarettesbyAbdullah."(WhateverhappeoAbdullah?)Chucklesdoeseverythiaughthimatdog-school--fetches,carries,jumpsthroughaflaminghoop--butnowandthenhefetshisscript,fetshelivesinPantoland,remembersheisarealdogprecipitatedintoawondrousworldhtsandpungendrustlings.Hewillrundowntothefootlights,hewilllookoutoverthedaisyfieldofupturned,expetfad,afteramomentspuzzlement,givealittlequestioningbark.
ItwasnotlikethiswhenTotodroppeddownintoOz;itismorelikeitwaswhenTotolandedback,alas,inKansas.Chucklesdoesnotlikeit.Chucklesfeelsletdown.
ThenRobinHoodorPrinceCharmingorwhoeveritishasthetitular--and"tits"istheoperativewordwiththisone--ownershipofChucklesinPantoland,scoopshimupagainstherbosomandhehasbeensaved.HehasreturoPantoland.InPantoland,heliveforever.
InPantoland,whichistheivaloftheunaowledgedandthefiestaoftherepressed,everythingisexcessiveandgenderisvariable.
ABriefLookattheCitizensofPantoland
THEDAME
Double-sexedandself-suffit,theDame,thesacredtraeofPantoland,mashim/herselfinanumberofguises.Forexamplehe/shemightintroducehim/herselfthus:
"Mynameisankey."Thensternlyadjuretheaudience:"Smilewhenyousaythat!"
BecauseTwankeyrhymeswith--pardonme,vicar;and,
Onceuponadistanttime,
TheytalkedinPantolandinrhyme...
butnowtheytalkindoubleentendre,whichisalanguageallofitsownandisated,notwiththeacuterave,butwiththeeyebrows.Doubleentehatis,everydaydiscoursewhichhasbeendippedintheinfiniterichesofadirtymind.
She/hestarsasMoose.Inderella,yougettwoforthepriceofohtheUglySisters.Iftheythrowindersstepmother,thatsabonanza,thatsthree.ThenthereisJacksMuminJadtheBeanstalkwherethepresenceofdstemincloseproximityramshomethe"phallicmother"aspectoftheDame.TheQuees(whostolesometarts).GrannyinRedRidingHood,wherethewolf--"Ooooer!"--gobblesherup.He/shepopsupeverywhereinPantoland,titteringandsquealing:"Lookout,girls!Theresaman!!!"whereverthePrincipalBoy(q.v.)appears.
BigwigsandroundspotseohercheekandeyelasheslohanthoseofDaisytheCow;olihatdipandswayandsupportamassofcrispypetticoatsoutofwhiesrunningChucklestheDingbehindhimastringofsausagesplucked,evidently,fromtheDamesfu.
"Betteroutthanin."
He/shebestridesthestage.His/herenormousfootstepsresohtheantiquepast.Shebringswithhimthesacredterroriinthoseofhis/heravatarssuchasLisaMaron,theandrogynousgod-goddessoftheAbomeypahegreatgodShango,thunderdeityoftheYorubas,whobeeithermaleorfemale;thesacrificialpriestwho,inthego,dressedlikeawomanandwascalled"Grandma".
TheDamebendsover,whipsupherolines;shehasthreepairsofknee-lengthbloomers,whichshewearsacctomood.
OnepairofbloomersismadeoutoftheUnionJack,forthesakeofpatriotism.
ThesedpairofbloomersisquarteredredandblamemoryofUtopia.
Thethirdandvastestpairofbloomersisscarlet,withatargeto,tredonthearsehole,andthispairiswhollydedicatedtoobsity.
Roars.Screams.Hoots.
Sheturnsandcurtsies.Andwhatdoyouknow,she/hehasshovedatrundowrousers,hasntshe?
InBurgundy,intheMiddleAges,theyheldaFeastofFoolsthatlastedallthroughthedeaddays,thatvatlapseoftimeduringwhich,acctothehairy-leggedmythologyoftheNorsemen,theskythesun.Bythetimetheskywolfpukeditupagain,apersonorpersonsunknownhadfuckedtheNewYearbatobeingduringthedayswhenalltheboysworesprigsofmistletoeintheirhats.Filthywork,butsomebodyhadtodoit.Bythefourteeury,thefar-from-hairy-leggedBurgundianshadfottenallabouttheskywolf,ofcourse;buthadtheyalsottentheiasti-timeoftheSolstice,whiceuponatime,wasalsothetimeoftheSaturnalia,thetopsy-turvytime,"theLibertiesofDecember",whenmastersedplaceswithslaveandanythingcouldhappen?
Themid-winterivalinOldBurgundy,knownastheFeastofFools,wasreignedoverinstylebyamandressedasawomanwhomtheyusedtocallMèreFolle,CrazyMother.
CrazyMotherturnsroundandcurtsies.Shepullsthetrunoutofherbloomers.Allshriekinterrifieddelightandturnawaytheireyes.Butwheersdaretolookagain,theyenteronlyhis/herseraphicsmileand,loandbehold!thetrunhasturoamagid.
TwaheQuees/MoosetapsDaisytheCowwithherwand,DaisytheCowgivesoutwithachorusof"DownbytheOldBullandBush".松语文学www.16sy.coM免费小说阅读
InPantoland,
Everythingisgrand.
Well,letsnotexaggerate--grandish.Notlikewhatitusedtobebut,then,whatis.Evenso,allstillbrightlycoloured--garish,infact,allyourprimaries,red,yellow,blue.Andallexcessive,sothatyourcastlehasmoreturretsthanaregularcastle,yourforestissiderablymoreimperablethantheaverageforestand,notinfrequently,yourcowhasmorethanitsnaturalshareofteatsandudders.Weretalkingmultipleprojes,here,spikes,sprouts,boobs,bums.Itsabristlingworld,inPantolaherphallicorelsedemonically,aggressivelyfemaleandtheressomethingarchaicbehinditall,archaitheworstsense.Somethingpositivelyfilthy.
Butallalsotwo-dimensional,sothatMaidMarianshouse,inPantolandsfictiveNottingham,isflatasapahefrontdoormaywellopenwhenshegoesin,butitmakesahollowsoundbehindherwhensheslamsitshutairefa?adegetstheshivers.Robinserenadesherfrombelow;sheopensherwindowtoriposteandwhatyouseebehindherofherbedroomisonlyapaintedbedheadonapaintedwall.
Ofcourse,therealproblemhereisthatitisBaronHardupofHardupHall,fatherofderella,stepfatheroftheUglySisters,who,thesebarrendays,alltoooftenoccupiesthepostofMinisterofFinanPantoland.Occasionally,evennow,thefree-spenderssuchasPrincessBadroulbadortakethingsintotheirownhandsandthenyougetsomewonderfuleffects,suchasathree-mastedgalleoninfullsailbreastingthroughtumultuousstormswiththunderboomingandlightningbreakingaboutthesparsasthegallantshiptakesDickWhittingtonandhiscateitherawayfromorelsebacktoLondonamidstanostalgicseriesoftableauxvivantsofBritishnavalheroessuchasRaleigh,Drake,CaptainCookandNelson,discthingsorkeepingtheelsafeflishshipping,whileDickgivesoutafull-throatedtraltorenditionof"IfIhadahammer"withachorusofratsinmasksandtights,courtesyoftheItaliatischool.
Illusionandtransformation,kitintopalacewiththeaidofgauzeetc.etc.etc.Youknowthekindofthing.Italloney.And,sometimes,asifitwerethegreatestillusionofall,theremightbeanincursionofthereal.Realhorses,perhaps,trotting,neighingandwhinnying,largeaslife.Yet"largeaslife"isnttherightphrase,atall,atall."Largeaslife"theymightbe,iextoftheauditorium,butwhentheprosiumarchgapesaswideasthemouthoftheogreinJadtheBeanstalk,thosefortywhitehorsespullingtheglasscoachoftheprincesslookaslittleandinsequentialaswhitemice.Theyarereal,allright,butinsignifit,andonlyraisealaughorroundofapplauseifohemientlydropsdung.
Andsometimestherellbeadog,oftehosesandy-coloured,short-hairedterriers.Ontheprogrammes,itwillsay:"Chuckles,playedbyhimself,"justabovewhereitsays:"CigarettesbyAbdullah."(WhateverhappeoAbdullah?)Chucklesdoeseverythiaughthimatdog-school--fetches,carries,jumpsthroughaflaminghoop--butnowandthenhefetshisscript,fetshelivesinPantoland,remembersheisarealdogprecipitatedintoawondrousworldhtsandpungendrustlings.Hewillrundowntothefootlights,hewilllookoutoverthedaisyfieldofupturned,expetfad,afteramomentspuzzlement,givealittlequestioningbark.
ItwasnotlikethiswhenTotodroppeddownintoOz;itismorelikeitwaswhenTotolandedback,alas,inKansas.Chucklesdoesnotlikeit.Chucklesfeelsletdown.
ThenRobinHoodorPrinceCharmingorwhoeveritishasthetitular--and"tits"istheoperativewordwiththisone--ownershipofChucklesinPantoland,scoopshimupagainstherbosomandhehasbeensaved.HehasreturoPantoland.InPantoland,heliveforever.
InPantoland,whichistheivaloftheunaowledgedandthefiestaoftherepressed,everythingisexcessiveandgenderisvariable.
ABriefLookattheCitizensofPantoland
THEDAME
Double-sexedandself-suffit,theDame,thesacredtraeofPantoland,mashim/herselfinanumberofguises.Forexamplehe/shemightintroducehim/herselfthus:
"Mynameisankey."Thensternlyadjuretheaudience:"Smilewhenyousaythat!"
BecauseTwankeyrhymeswith--pardonme,vicar;and,
Onceuponadistanttime,
TheytalkedinPantolandinrhyme...
butnowtheytalkindoubleentendre,whichisalanguageallofitsownandisated,notwiththeacuterave,butwiththeeyebrows.Doubleentehatis,everydaydiscoursewhichhasbeendippedintheinfiniterichesofadirtymind.
She/hestarsasMoose.Inderella,yougettwoforthepriceofohtheUglySisters.Iftheythrowindersstepmother,thatsabonanza,thatsthree.ThenthereisJacksMuminJadtheBeanstalkwherethepresenceofdstemincloseproximityramshomethe"phallicmother"aspectoftheDame.TheQuees(whostolesometarts).GrannyinRedRidingHood,wherethewolf--"Ooooer!"--gobblesherup.He/shepopsupeverywhereinPantoland,titteringandsquealing:"Lookout,girls!Theresaman!!!"whereverthePrincipalBoy(q.v.)appears.
BigwigsandroundspotseohercheekandeyelasheslohanthoseofDaisytheCow;olihatdipandswayandsupportamassofcrispypetticoatsoutofwhiesrunningChucklestheDingbehindhimastringofsausagesplucked,evidently,fromtheDamesfu.
"Betteroutthanin."
He/shebestridesthestage.His/herenormousfootstepsresohtheantiquepast.Shebringswithhimthesacredterroriinthoseofhis/heravatarssuchasLisaMaron,theandrogynousgod-goddessoftheAbomeypahegreatgodShango,thunderdeityoftheYorubas,whobeeithermaleorfemale;thesacrificialpriestwho,inthego,dressedlikeawomanandwascalled"Grandma".
TheDamebendsover,whipsupherolines;shehasthreepairsofknee-lengthbloomers,whichshewearsacctomood.
OnepairofbloomersismadeoutoftheUnionJack,forthesakeofpatriotism.
ThesedpairofbloomersisquarteredredandblamemoryofUtopia.
Thethirdandvastestpairofbloomersisscarlet,withatargeto,tredonthearsehole,andthispairiswhollydedicatedtoobsity.
Roars.Screams.Hoots.
Sheturnsandcurtsies.Andwhatdoyouknow,she/hehasshovedatrundowrousers,hasntshe?
InBurgundy,intheMiddleAges,theyheldaFeastofFoolsthatlastedallthroughthedeaddays,thatvatlapseoftimeduringwhich,acctothehairy-leggedmythologyoftheNorsemen,theskythesun.Bythetimetheskywolfpukeditupagain,apersonorpersonsunknownhadfuckedtheNewYearbatobeingduringthedayswhenalltheboysworesprigsofmistletoeintheirhats.Filthywork,butsomebodyhadtodoit.Bythefourteeury,thefar-from-hairy-leggedBurgundianshadfottenallabouttheskywolf,ofcourse;buthadtheyalsottentheiasti-timeoftheSolstice,whiceuponatime,wasalsothetimeoftheSaturnalia,thetopsy-turvytime,"theLibertiesofDecember",whenmastersedplaceswithslaveandanythingcouldhappen?
Themid-winterivalinOldBurgundy,knownastheFeastofFools,wasreignedoverinstylebyamandressedasawomanwhomtheyusedtocallMèreFolle,CrazyMother.
CrazyMotherturnsroundandcurtsies.Shepullsthetrunoutofherbloomers.Allshriekinterrifieddelightandturnawaytheireyes.Butwheersdaretolookagain,theyenteronlyhis/herseraphicsmileand,loandbehold!thetrunhasturoamagid.
TwaheQuees/MoosetapsDaisytheCowwithherwand,DaisytheCowgivesoutwithachorusof"DownbytheOldBullandBush".松语文学www.16sy.coM免费小说阅读
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并不代表本站立场!本站亦无法严格审:American Ghosts and Old World Wonders最新章节其版权归属。如您对American Ghosts and Old World WondersTXT下载持有版权方面的异议，请联系本站客服。我们将于72小时内处理。
Copyright (C) 2019 All Rights Reserved 版权所有：松语文学