CHAPTER 14
Lookingfaraheadoh,Ispiedherreturningtocamp,whichsetmymindatease.Sheappearedbetweerees,movinglikeadeeralongtheridgeliheithelibraryhadleftmeeagertoapologize,soItookashortcutthroughtheforestthatwouldallowmetocutheroffalongherroute.Mymindbuzzedwiththestoryofthemanintheyard.Ihopedtotellherbeforetheimportantpartsvahefusion.Speckwouldbemad,rightfullyso,butherpassionwouldmollifyanyanger.AsIdrewnear,shemusthavespottedme,forshetookoffinasprint.HadIatedbefivingchase,perhapsIwouldhavecaughther,buttheroughterraiedspeed.Inmyhaste,Isoeonafallenbrandlandedfacedowni.Spittingleavesandtwigs,IlookeduptoseeSpeckhadalreadymadeitintocampandwastalkingwithBéka.
"Shedoesntwanttospeakwithyou,"theoldtoadsaiduponmyarrival,andclampedhishandonmyshoulder.Afewoftheelders—Igel,Ragno,Zanzara,andBlomma—hadsidledohim,fawall.
"ButIalktoher."
LuchógandKivijoiheothers.Smaolachwalkedtowardthegroupfrht,hishandschedandshaking.Onionsapproachedfrommyleft,amenagtoothsomesmileonherfaihemencircledme.Igelsteppediheringandjabbedafimychest.
"Youhaveviolatedourtrust."
"Whatareyoutalkingabout?"
"Shefollowedyou,Aniday.Shesawyouwiththeman.Youweretoavoidanytactwiththem,yetthereyouwere,tryingtounicatewithohem."Igelpushedmetotheground,kigupacloudofrottenleaves.Humiliated,Iquicklysprangbayfeet.Myfeargrewastheothershollerediives.
"Doyouknowhowdangerousthatwas?"
"Teachhimalesson."
"Doyouuandweotbediscovered?"
"Sohewontfetagain."
"Theycouldeandcaptureus,andthenwewillneverbefree."
"Punishhim."
Igeldidnotstrikethefirstblow.Frombehind,afistoraclubsmashedintomykidneys,andIarchedmyback.Withmybodythusexposed,Igelpunchedmesquarelyinthesolarplexus,andIhunchedforward.Alineofdroolspilledfrommyopenmouth.Theyooncelikeapackofwilddingdownwoundedprey.Theblowscamefromalldires,andinitialshockgaveain.Theyscrapedmyfacewiththeirnails,rippedhunksofhairfrommyscalp,saeethintomyshoulder,drawingblood.Aropyarmyneck,shuttingofftheflowaggedamygerise.Amidthefury,theireyesblazedwithfrenzy,andsheerhatredtwistedtheirfeatures.Onebyoheypeeledoff,sated,andthepressurelessened,butthosewhoremainedkickedatmyribs,tauntiogetup,snarlingandgrowlingatmetofightback.Icouldnotmusterthestrength.Beforewalkingaway,Békastompedonmyfingers,andIgeldeliveredakickwitheachwordofhisfinaladmonition:"Donottalktopeopleagain."
Iyeyesandstayedstill.Thesunshonedownthroughthebrahetrees,warmingmybody.Myjointsachedfromthefall,andmyfingersswelledandthrobbed.Oneeyeaintedbladblue,andbloodoozedfromcutsandpooledbehplumbruises.Mymouthtastedofvomitanddirt,andIpassedoutinarumpledheap.
Coolwateronmycutsandbruisesstartledmeawake,andmyfirstvisionwasofSpetoverme,wipingthebloodfrommyface.DirectlybehioodSmaoladLuchóg,theirfacespih.DropsofmybloodleftaredpatSpeckswhitesweater.WhenItriedtospeak,shepressedthewetclothtomylips.
"Aniday,Iamsosorry.Ididnotwantthistohappen."
"Weresorry,too,"Smaolachsaid."Butthelawhasaruthlesslogic."
ChavisorypokedoutherheadfrombehindSpecksshoulder."Itooknopartinit."
"Youshouldnothaveleftme,Aniday.Youshouldhavetrustedme."
Isatupslowlyandfacedmytormentors."Whydidyouletthem?"
"Itooknopart,"Chavisorysaid.
LuchógkbesideSpedspokeforall."Wehadtodoit,sothatyouwillnoteverfet.Youspoketothehuman,andifhecaughtyou,youwouldbegoneforever."
"SupposeIwanttogoback."
Noonelookedmeintheeye.Chavisoryhummedtoherselfwhiletheotherskeptsilent.
"Ithinkthatmighthavebeenmyrealfather,Speck.Fromtheotherworld.Ormaybeitwasamonsterandadream.Butitwaoeintothehouse.Ihavebeentherebefore."
"Doesntmatterwhohewas,"saidSmaolach."Father,mother,sister,brother,yourAuntFannysunohatmatters.Wereyourfamily."
Ispatoutamouthfulofdirtandblood."Afamilydoesuposowheyhaveagoodreason."
Chavisoryshoutedinmyear,"Ididouchyou!"Shedancedspiralsarouhers.
"Wewerefollowingrules,"saidSpeck.
"Idontwanttostayhere.Iwanttogobayrealfamily."
"Aniday,yout,"Specksaid."Theythinkyohesepasttenyears.Youmaylooklikeyht,butyouarealmosteighteen.Wearestutime."
Luchógadded,"Youdbeaghosttothem."
"Iwanttogohome."
Spefrontedme."Listen,thereareonlythreepossiblechoices,andgoinghomeisnotohem."
&quht,"Smaolachsaid.Hesatdownonarottiumpandtedoffthepossibilitiesonhisfingers."Ohatwhileyoudooldhere,deathlyill,youdiebyact.Irememberonefelloenta-walkingawintryday.Hemadeafoolishcalculationinhisleapfromthetopofthebridgetotheedgeoftheriverbank,andhisjumpwasnotjumpyenough.Hefellintotheriver,wentrightthroughtheiddrowned,frozeh."
"Actshappen,"Luchógadded."Longago,youcouldfindyourselfeaten.Wolvesandmountainlionsprowledtheseparts.Didyoueverhearoftheonefromupnorthwhowiinsideacaveandwokeupspringtimeoaveryhungrygrizzly?Amandiebyanyceimaginable."
"Two,youcouldberidofus,"Smaolachsaid,"bysimplyleaving.Justupandsaunteroffandgoliveapartandalone.Wediscethatsortofattitude,mindyou,forweneedyouheretohelpusfichild.Tisharderthanyouthinktopretendtobesomeoneelse."
"Besides,itisalonesomelife,"saidChavisory.
"True,"Speckagreed."Butyoubelonelywithadozenfriendsbesideyou."
"Ifyougothatway,youremorelikelytomeetwithasingularfate,"Luchógsaid."Supposeyoufellinaditdcouldup?Thenwherewouldyoube?"
SaidSmaolach,"Themfellowsusuallysuccumb,doosometwistintheroad?Youloseyourwayinablizzard.Ablackwidownipsyourthumbasyousleep.Andofindtheae,thecowsliportheboiledfrogseggs."
"Besides,wherewouldyougothatsaerthanthis?"Luchógasked.
"Iwouldgocrazybeingjustbymyselfallthetime,"Chavisoryadded.
"Then,"Luchógtoldher,"youwouldhavetomakethege."
Specklookedbeyoowardthetreeline."Thatsthethirdway.Youfindtherightchildoherside,andyoutakeherplace."
"Nowyourefusingtheboy,"saidSmaolach."First,youhavetofindachild,learnallabouthim.Allofuswatdstudyhim.Fromadistance,mind."
"Ithastobesomebodywhoisnthappy,"Chavisorysaid.
Smaolachscowledather."Nevermindthat.Weobservethechildinteams.Whilecertainpeopletakedownhishabits,othersstudyhisvoice."
"Startwiththename,"saidSpeck."Gatherallthefacts:age,birthdaybrothersandsisters."
Chavisoryinterruptedher."Idstayawayfromboyswithdogs.Dogsarebornsuspicious."
"Youhavetoknowenough,"Specksaid,"soyoumakepeoplebelieveyouareohem.Achildoftheirown."
Carefullyrollingacigarette,Luchógsaid,"IvebetimesthoughtthatIdlookforalargefamily,withlotsofkidsandsoon,andthenpicktheohemiddlethatnobodyllmissornoticetheyregoneforabit.OrifIfetsomedetailoramslightlyoffinmyimitation,nobodyisthewiser.Maybenumbersixofthirteen,orfourofseven.Notaseasyasitoncewas,nowthatmumsanddadsarenthavingsomanybabies."
"Idliketobeababyagain,"saidChavisory.
"Onceyouhavemadethechoice,"saidSmaolach,"wegoinandgrabthechild.Heorshesgottobealone,oryoullbefoundout.HaveyoueverheardthetaleofthemonesinRussiaorthereabouts,wheretheycaughtthelotofthemstealingatinyCossackladwithpoih,andthemCossackstookallourboysofthewoodsandburoacrisp?"
"Fireisadevilofawaytogo,"saidLuchóg."DidIevertellyouofthefaerygelingcaughtsnoopingaroundtheroomofagirlshewishedtoreplace?Shehearstheparentsein,andleapsinthecloset,makingthegerightthereintheroom.Atfirst,theparentsthoughtnothingofit,whentheyopehedoorandthereshelayinginthedark.Laterthatday,therealgirleshome,andwhatdoyouthink?Theresthetwoofthemsidebyside,andourfriendwouldhavemadeit,butshehadlearnedhowtospeaklikethelittlegirl.Sothemothersays,NowwhieofyouisLudtherealLucysays,Iam,aherLucyletsoutasquawktoraisethedead.Shehadtojumpoutthesed-floorwindowandstartallain."
Smaolachlookedperplexedduringhisfriendsstory,scratghisheadasiftryingtorecallanimportaail."Ah,theresabitofmagic,ofcourse.Webindupthechildinawebandleadhimtothewater."
Spinningonherheels,Chavisoryshouted,"Aheintation.Youmustntfetthat."
"Inhegoeslikeabaptism,"Smaolatinued."Outhees,oneofus.oleaveexceptbyohreeways,andIwouldnotgiveyoumyshoesforthefirsttwo."
Chavisorydrewacirthedustwithherbaretoe."RemembertheGermanboywhoplayedthepiano?TheonebeforeAniday."
Withashorthiss,SpeckgrabbedChavisorybythehairandpulledthepoorcreaturetoher.Shesatonherchestandthrewherhandsuponherface,massagingandkneadingChavisorysskinlikesomuchdough.Thegirlscreamedandcriedlikeafoxirap.Whenshehadfinished,SpeckrevealedareasonablecopyofherowfathevisageofChavisory.Theylookedliketwins.
"Youputmeback,"Chavisoryplained.
"Youputmeback."Speckimitatedherperfectly.
IcouldnotbelievewhatIwasseeing.
"Theresyourfuture,littletreasure.Beholdthegeling,"laidSmaolach."Goingbacktothepastasyourselfisnotanoption.Butwhenyoureturnasagedpersontotheirworld,yougettostaythere,growupasohem,liveasohem,moreorless,growoldastimeallows,andyoulldothatyet,whenyourturnes."
"Myturn?Iwanttogohhtnow.HowdoIdoit?"
"Youdont,"Luchógsaid."Youhavetowaituntiltherestofushavegoheresanaturalordertoourworldthatmusturbed.Onechildforonegeling.Whenyourtimees,youwillfindanotherchildfromadifferentfamilythanwhatyouleftbehind.Youotgobackwhene."
"Imafraid,Aniday,yourelastintheline.Youllhavetobepatient."
LuchógandSmaolachtookChavisorybehindthehoneysuckleaomanipulateherface.Thethreeofthemlaughedandcarriedhthewholeprocess."Justmakemeprettyagain,"and"Letsgetohemmagazihthewomenspictures,"and"Hey,shelookslikeAudreyHepburn."Eventually,theyfixedherfadsheflewfromtheirclutcheslikeabat.
Speckwasunusuallykindtomefortherestofthatday,perhapsoutofmisplacedguiltformybeating.Hergentlenessremindedmeofmymotherstouch,orwhatIthoughtIremembered.Myownmhtaswellhavebeenthephantom,oranyotherfitobejured.Iwasfettingagaiinbetweenmemoryandimaginationblurring.ThemanIsaw,couldhebemyfather?Iwondered.Heappearedtohavereizedme,butIwasnothisson,onlyashadowfromthewoods.Inthedeadofnight,IwrotedoworyofthethreewaysinMessnotebook,hopingtouanditalliure.Speckkeptmepanywhiletheothersslept.Iarlight,hercareshadvanishedfromherface;evenhereyes,usuallysotired,radiatedpassion.
"Iamsorrytheyhurtyou."
"Itdoesnthurt,"Iwhispered,stiffandsore.
"Lifeherehasitspensations.Listen."
Lowinaflyway,anowlsweptbetweerees,unrollingitswingso.Spesed,thefinehairsonherarmsbristling.
"Youwillold,"shesaid."Youwonthavetoworryaboutgettingmarriedorhavingbabiesorfindingajob.Nograyhairandwrinkles,hfallingout.Youwontneedaeoracrutch."
Weheardtheowldesdandstrike.Themousescreamedoheit.
"Likechildrenwhonevergrowup,"Isaid.
"Theindifferentchildrenoftheearth."Shelethersentengerintheair.Ifixedmyeyeuponasiar,hopingtoseheearthorseetheheavensmove.Thistrickofstaringanddriftingwiththeskyhascuredmyinsomniamanytimesovertheyears,butnotthatnight.Thosestarswerefixedandthisglobecreakedasifstuitsrotation.Eyeslifted,pointingtothemoon,Spesideredthenight,thoughIhadnoideawhatshewasthinking.
"Washemyfather,Speck?"
"Iottellyou.Letgoofthepast,Aniday.Itslikeholdingdandelionstothewind.Waitfortherightmoment,andtheseedswillscatteraway."Shelookedatme."Youshouldrest."
"It.Mymindisfilledwithnoises."
Shepressedherfiomylips."Listen."
Nothingstirred.Herpresence,myown."Ithearathing."
Butshecouldhearadistantsound,andhergazeturnedinward,asiftransportedtoitssource.松语文学www.16sy.coM免费小说阅读
"Shedoesntwanttospeakwithyou,"theoldtoadsaiduponmyarrival,andclampedhishandonmyshoulder.Afewoftheelders—Igel,Ragno,Zanzara,andBlomma—hadsidledohim,fawall.
"ButIalktoher."
LuchógandKivijoiheothers.Smaolachwalkedtowardthegroupfrht,hishandschedandshaking.Onionsapproachedfrommyleft,amenagtoothsomesmileonherfaihemencircledme.Igelsteppediheringandjabbedafimychest.
"Youhaveviolatedourtrust."
"Whatareyoutalkingabout?"
"Shefollowedyou,Aniday.Shesawyouwiththeman.Youweretoavoidanytactwiththem,yetthereyouwere,tryingtounicatewithohem."Igelpushedmetotheground,kigupacloudofrottenleaves.Humiliated,Iquicklysprangbayfeet.Myfeargrewastheothershollerediives.
"Doyouknowhowdangerousthatwas?"
"Teachhimalesson."
"Doyouuandweotbediscovered?"
"Sohewontfetagain."
"Theycouldeandcaptureus,andthenwewillneverbefree."
"Punishhim."
Igeldidnotstrikethefirstblow.Frombehind,afistoraclubsmashedintomykidneys,andIarchedmyback.Withmybodythusexposed,Igelpunchedmesquarelyinthesolarplexus,andIhunchedforward.Alineofdroolspilledfrommyopenmouth.Theyooncelikeapackofwilddingdownwoundedprey.Theblowscamefromalldires,andinitialshockgaveain.Theyscrapedmyfacewiththeirnails,rippedhunksofhairfrommyscalp,saeethintomyshoulder,drawingblood.Aropyarmyneck,shuttingofftheflowaggedamygerise.Amidthefury,theireyesblazedwithfrenzy,andsheerhatredtwistedtheirfeatures.Onebyoheypeeledoff,sated,andthepressurelessened,butthosewhoremainedkickedatmyribs,tauntiogetup,snarlingandgrowlingatmetofightback.Icouldnotmusterthestrength.Beforewalkingaway,Békastompedonmyfingers,andIgeldeliveredakickwitheachwordofhisfinaladmonition:"Donottalktopeopleagain."
Iyeyesandstayedstill.Thesunshonedownthroughthebrahetrees,warmingmybody.Myjointsachedfromthefall,andmyfingersswelledandthrobbed.Oneeyeaintedbladblue,andbloodoozedfromcutsandpooledbehplumbruises.Mymouthtastedofvomitanddirt,andIpassedoutinarumpledheap.
Coolwateronmycutsandbruisesstartledmeawake,andmyfirstvisionwasofSpetoverme,wipingthebloodfrommyface.DirectlybehioodSmaoladLuchóg,theirfacespih.DropsofmybloodleftaredpatSpeckswhitesweater.WhenItriedtospeak,shepressedthewetclothtomylips.
"Aniday,Iamsosorry.Ididnotwantthistohappen."
"Weresorry,too,"Smaolachsaid."Butthelawhasaruthlesslogic."
ChavisorypokedoutherheadfrombehindSpecksshoulder."Itooknopartinit."
"Youshouldnothaveleftme,Aniday.Youshouldhavetrustedme."
Isatupslowlyandfacedmytormentors."Whydidyouletthem?"
"Itooknopart,"Chavisorysaid.
LuchógkbesideSpedspokeforall."Wehadtodoit,sothatyouwillnoteverfet.Youspoketothehuman,andifhecaughtyou,youwouldbegoneforever."
"SupposeIwanttogoback."
Noonelookedmeintheeye.Chavisoryhummedtoherselfwhiletheotherskeptsilent.
"Ithinkthatmighthavebeenmyrealfather,Speck.Fromtheotherworld.Ormaybeitwasamonsterandadream.Butitwaoeintothehouse.Ihavebeentherebefore."
"Doesntmatterwhohewas,"saidSmaolach."Father,mother,sister,brother,yourAuntFannysunohatmatters.Wereyourfamily."
Ispatoutamouthfulofdirtandblood."Afamilydoesuposowheyhaveagoodreason."
Chavisoryshoutedinmyear,"Ididouchyou!"Shedancedspiralsarouhers.
"Wewerefollowingrules,"saidSpeck.
"Idontwanttostayhere.Iwanttogobayrealfamily."
"Aniday,yout,"Specksaid."Theythinkyohesepasttenyears.Youmaylooklikeyht,butyouarealmosteighteen.Wearestutime."
Luchógadded,"Youdbeaghosttothem."
"Iwanttogohome."
Spefrontedme."Listen,thereareonlythreepossiblechoices,andgoinghomeisnotohem."
&quht,"Smaolachsaid.Hesatdownonarottiumpandtedoffthepossibilitiesonhisfingers."Ohatwhileyoudooldhere,deathlyill,youdiebyact.Irememberonefelloenta-walkingawintryday.Hemadeafoolishcalculationinhisleapfromthetopofthebridgetotheedgeoftheriverbank,andhisjumpwasnotjumpyenough.Hefellintotheriver,wentrightthroughtheiddrowned,frozeh."
"Actshappen,"Luchógadded."Longago,youcouldfindyourselfeaten.Wolvesandmountainlionsprowledtheseparts.Didyoueverhearoftheonefromupnorthwhowiinsideacaveandwokeupspringtimeoaveryhungrygrizzly?Amandiebyanyceimaginable."
"Two,youcouldberidofus,"Smaolachsaid,"bysimplyleaving.Justupandsaunteroffandgoliveapartandalone.Wediscethatsortofattitude,mindyou,forweneedyouheretohelpusfichild.Tisharderthanyouthinktopretendtobesomeoneelse."
"Besides,itisalonesomelife,"saidChavisory.
"True,"Speckagreed."Butyoubelonelywithadozenfriendsbesideyou."
"Ifyougothatway,youremorelikelytomeetwithasingularfate,"Luchógsaid."Supposeyoufellinaditdcouldup?Thenwherewouldyoube?"
SaidSmaolach,"Themfellowsusuallysuccumb,doosometwistintheroad?Youloseyourwayinablizzard.Ablackwidownipsyourthumbasyousleep.Andofindtheae,thecowsliportheboiledfrogseggs."
"Besides,wherewouldyougothatsaerthanthis?"Luchógasked.
"Iwouldgocrazybeingjustbymyselfallthetime,"Chavisoryadded.
"Then,"Luchógtoldher,"youwouldhavetomakethege."
Specklookedbeyoowardthetreeline."Thatsthethirdway.Youfindtherightchildoherside,andyoutakeherplace."
"Nowyourefusingtheboy,"saidSmaolach."First,youhavetofindachild,learnallabouthim.Allofuswatdstudyhim.Fromadistance,mind."
"Ithastobesomebodywhoisnthappy,"Chavisorysaid.
Smaolachscowledather."Nevermindthat.Weobservethechildinteams.Whilecertainpeopletakedownhishabits,othersstudyhisvoice."
"Startwiththename,"saidSpeck."Gatherallthefacts:age,birthdaybrothersandsisters."
Chavisoryinterruptedher."Idstayawayfromboyswithdogs.Dogsarebornsuspicious."
"Youhavetoknowenough,"Specksaid,"soyoumakepeoplebelieveyouareohem.Achildoftheirown."
Carefullyrollingacigarette,Luchógsaid,"IvebetimesthoughtthatIdlookforalargefamily,withlotsofkidsandsoon,andthenpicktheohemiddlethatnobodyllmissornoticetheyregoneforabit.OrifIfetsomedetailoramslightlyoffinmyimitation,nobodyisthewiser.Maybenumbersixofthirteen,orfourofseven.Notaseasyasitoncewas,nowthatmumsanddadsarenthavingsomanybabies."
"Idliketobeababyagain,"saidChavisory.
"Onceyouhavemadethechoice,"saidSmaolach,"wegoinandgrabthechild.Heorshesgottobealone,oryoullbefoundout.HaveyoueverheardthetaleofthemonesinRussiaorthereabouts,wheretheycaughtthelotofthemstealingatinyCossackladwithpoih,andthemCossackstookallourboysofthewoodsandburoacrisp?"
"Fireisadevilofawaytogo,"saidLuchóg."DidIevertellyouofthefaerygelingcaughtsnoopingaroundtheroomofagirlshewishedtoreplace?Shehearstheparentsein,andleapsinthecloset,makingthegerightthereintheroom.Atfirst,theparentsthoughtnothingofit,whentheyopehedoorandthereshelayinginthedark.Laterthatday,therealgirleshome,andwhatdoyouthink?Theresthetwoofthemsidebyside,andourfriendwouldhavemadeit,butshehadlearnedhowtospeaklikethelittlegirl.Sothemothersays,NowwhieofyouisLudtherealLucysays,Iam,aherLucyletsoutasquawktoraisethedead.Shehadtojumpoutthesed-floorwindowandstartallain."
Smaolachlookedperplexedduringhisfriendsstory,scratghisheadasiftryingtorecallanimportaail."Ah,theresabitofmagic,ofcourse.Webindupthechildinawebandleadhimtothewater."
Spinningonherheels,Chavisoryshouted,"Aheintation.Youmustntfetthat."
"Inhegoeslikeabaptism,"Smaolatinued."Outhees,oneofus.oleaveexceptbyohreeways,andIwouldnotgiveyoumyshoesforthefirsttwo."
Chavisorydrewacirthedustwithherbaretoe."RemembertheGermanboywhoplayedthepiano?TheonebeforeAniday."
Withashorthiss,SpeckgrabbedChavisorybythehairandpulledthepoorcreaturetoher.Shesatonherchestandthrewherhandsuponherface,massagingandkneadingChavisorysskinlikesomuchdough.Thegirlscreamedandcriedlikeafoxirap.Whenshehadfinished,SpeckrevealedareasonablecopyofherowfathevisageofChavisory.Theylookedliketwins.
"Youputmeback,"Chavisoryplained.
"Youputmeback."Speckimitatedherperfectly.
IcouldnotbelievewhatIwasseeing.
"Theresyourfuture,littletreasure.Beholdthegeling,"laidSmaolach."Goingbacktothepastasyourselfisnotanoption.Butwhenyoureturnasagedpersontotheirworld,yougettostaythere,growupasohem,liveasohem,moreorless,growoldastimeallows,andyoulldothatyet,whenyourturnes."
"Myturn?Iwanttogohhtnow.HowdoIdoit?"
"Youdont,"Luchógsaid."Youhavetowaituntiltherestofushavegoheresanaturalordertoourworldthatmusturbed.Onechildforonegeling.Whenyourtimees,youwillfindanotherchildfromadifferentfamilythanwhatyouleftbehind.Youotgobackwhene."
"Imafraid,Aniday,yourelastintheline.Youllhavetobepatient."
LuchógandSmaolachtookChavisorybehindthehoneysuckleaomanipulateherface.Thethreeofthemlaughedandcarriedhthewholeprocess."Justmakemeprettyagain,"and"Letsgetohemmagazihthewomenspictures,"and"Hey,shelookslikeAudreyHepburn."Eventually,theyfixedherfadsheflewfromtheirclutcheslikeabat.
Speckwasunusuallykindtomefortherestofthatday,perhapsoutofmisplacedguiltformybeating.Hergentlenessremindedmeofmymotherstouch,orwhatIthoughtIremembered.Myownmhtaswellhavebeenthephantom,oranyotherfitobejured.Iwasfettingagaiinbetweenmemoryandimaginationblurring.ThemanIsaw,couldhebemyfather?Iwondered.Heappearedtohavereizedme,butIwasnothisson,onlyashadowfromthewoods.Inthedeadofnight,IwrotedoworyofthethreewaysinMessnotebook,hopingtouanditalliure.Speckkeptmepanywhiletheothersslept.Iarlight,hercareshadvanishedfromherface;evenhereyes,usuallysotired,radiatedpassion.
"Iamsorrytheyhurtyou."
"Itdoesnthurt,"Iwhispered,stiffandsore.
"Lifeherehasitspensations.Listen."
Lowinaflyway,anowlsweptbetweerees,unrollingitswingso.Spesed,thefinehairsonherarmsbristling.
"Youwillold,"shesaid."Youwonthavetoworryaboutgettingmarriedorhavingbabiesorfindingajob.Nograyhairandwrinkles,hfallingout.Youwontneedaeoracrutch."
Weheardtheowldesdandstrike.Themousescreamedoheit.
"Likechildrenwhonevergrowup,"Isaid.
"Theindifferentchildrenoftheearth."Shelethersentengerintheair.Ifixedmyeyeuponasiar,hopingtoseheearthorseetheheavensmove.Thistrickofstaringanddriftingwiththeskyhascuredmyinsomniamanytimesovertheyears,butnotthatnight.Thosestarswerefixedandthisglobecreakedasifstuitsrotation.Eyeslifted,pointingtothemoon,Spesideredthenight,thoughIhadnoideawhatshewasthinking.
"Washemyfather,Speck?"
"Iottellyou.Letgoofthepast,Aniday.Itslikeholdingdandelionstothewind.Waitfortherightmoment,andtheseedswillscatteraway."Shelookedatme."Youshouldrest."
"It.Mymindisfilledwithnoises."
Shepressedherfiomylips."Listen."
Nothingstirred.Herpresence,myown."Ithearathing."
Butshecouldhearadistantsound,andhergazeturnedinward,asiftransportedtoitssource.松语文学www.16sy.coM免费小说阅读